Benjamin Penguin

Why you ask? Oh, because Ben is only happy at night when one of his parents is kicked out of the bed and exiled to the futon in the living room.

Let me explain. Ben has pretty much never left our bed since he was born. It’s just so nice. But recently – and increasingly – Ben has been awaking in the middle of the night with a lot of fussing and crying and general malaise. Now, put on your thinking caps and walk this path with me, because I think all my clues will add up to my final realization.

Fact A: I often pass out on the futon in front of the TV. I always tell Adam to wake me up and make me move into the bedroom, but sometimes he fails to do so or I fail to be rousable. On these nights, Ben sleeps with nary a peep.

Fact B: On the nights in which I am roused and all three of us are in bed, Ben tosses and turns a lot and seems more fussy.

Fact C: On the nights in which I pass out in bed first and all three of us sleep in bed, Ben again tosses and turns a lot and seems more fussy.

Fact D: One night before a big day at work, I could not take the kicking and the fuss and went out onto the futon to sleep so that I would not be drowsy the next day. The fuss stopped pretty instantly. This has also happened when it is Adam that left one night because of his big day the following morning.

Soooooooooooo. Are you seeing the same pattern that I am seeing? I think Ben wants more space to sleep and gets uncomfortable when he does not have said space. The discomfort makes him angry. The anger wakes him. Then one of us clears the bed because we don’t have any other option at this time.

Looks like we might finally need to invest in a little kiddie bed. This feels good. It feels ok. In this whole parenting experience, there are some things that Adam and I prefer to be child-led. If he is running towards a stack of knives, we’ll immediately step in because stack of knives = bad. So that is a clear example of a non child-led situation. But with cosleeping? We were happy with that as long as it worked for everyone. It doesn’t seem to be working so much for Ben anymore and so it might be time to explore other options.  Since our home is nothing if not an IKEA museum, it’s time to head on over there and add a Swedish kiddie bed to our collection.